In 86 hours, three friends and I hit the road to Bardstown KY, to spend four days in silence with the Trappist monks at the Abbey of Gethsemani.
To say I’m looking forward to it would be an understatement. Not that I’m expecting a life changing event; anxiously looking for such things is usually a sure way to avoid them.
Mostly, I can’t wait to sink into silence and stillness for a few days while enjoying the monk’s hospitality. I’ve done longer, 9 day retreats with the Jesuits; what makes this different is that it’s my first opportunity to be immersed in over 1700 yrs of history and tradition. I wonder what that will be like.
Heather and I have visited Gethsemani many times, but always only in the areas open to the public. One of my favorite memories was when hiking along we came upon a group of burly bikers, decked out in full leather riding gear complete with tattoos and beards. The looked like clichéd actors filming a Hell’s Angels movie, until you noticed they were having a Bible study next to a statue of Jesus. “Now THAT” I thought, “is the kingdom of God right there!”
Like most things of deep meaning, Gethsemani is a paradox. On one hand it’s nothing special. A road passes too close to the abbey; the sound of tractors often fills the air along with the boom of occasional hunting neighbors or the firing of cannons at the distant Fort Knox. Visitors are sometimes overly noisy and rude and entries into guest books can have a shallow, superstitious tone. The monks themselves do not exude a particular holiness or spiritual grandeur. The singing during the liturgy of the hours (vigils, lauds, terce, etc) can sound flat and uninspired. The men who chose this way of life come from all manner of backgrounds, economic levels, and degrees of education. And they come with the same mix of healthy and unhealthy motives and character traits that we all have.
Yet, there is also an overwhelming passion to know God, know themselves, and live in an intentional community. Can you sometimes find a monk with an inflexible, rule-mongering and judgmental spirit? You bet. But, what has impressed me most from the reading I’ve been doing about the monastic life, is how there is an intense inner and corporate desire to change! Not to become what someone else wants them to be, but to become more who they each truly are.
Still, why do they come I wonder? Why chose such a radical lifestyle? I certainly see the attractiveness of some of it, but there are other areas that I just can’t wrap my mind around. Maybe I’ll learn something this weekend, maybe not. Regardless, I have a deep respect for those with a passion to live as authentic a life as possible; to live intentionally with awareness and compassion for all living things. Perhaps a little of that passion will rub off on me?
2 comments:
This sounds like it will be amazing. I know that this must be something important to you if you are counting down the hours!
We anxiously await your next post so we can hear your thoughts from the retreat. But maybe that's the problem: How can one verbalize a spiritual experience that was also an exclusively silent one? Words utterly fail!!!!!!!
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